Regrettably (for some), I’ve been a bit quiet these past few days- for those of you who interact on my Facebook page, you’ll know that my chronic illness has been a bit of a sod (it is relentless). I’ve sat down to write a little something tonight, with the intention of keeping things lighthearted.
Back in 2016, anti-MLM giants Timeless Vie created a fun game, in their article Let’s play MLM Bingo! Believe it or not, one of my followers actually got to play very recently, and I was there to witness it. In this post, I tell you about her gripping and exciting game as we play along.
As with my Its Really Not Your Fault article, the purpose of these articles is to delve deeper into hun-behaviour over social media, especially when they are misinformed by their uplines (or telling fibs, but I’ll always give the benefit of the doubt).
Here’s the bingo board we’ll be playing with.
It all started on Instagram, when my follower (let’s call her Violet) posted this:
“Tell me more about your Multi-Level Marketing opportunity. Said no one ever.”
As you can tell, Violet isn’t particularly keen on MLMs either (hence why she’s a follower!). She accompanies this picture by saying:
“… It’s not empowering other people and it’s certainly not ‘your’ business, wake up people and stop using friends and family to extract money for awful products that are mostly overpriced and not tested properly 😡 …”
This Instagram post attracts the attention of an Elite Green Status hun, who is not impressed with Violet’s shenanigans.
She leaps to the defence of her beloved business model, urging Violet to “research before forming an opinion“.
Thanks to Green Hun, Violet can cross the first square off her bingo board.
Yes some MLMs are a scam but this one is different…”
Violet is definitely not convinced that Younique is one of the “…great companies out there who do good…” She informs Green Hun that it is little more than brainwashing.
Green Hun is not having that, duly informing Violet that she is “…so misinformed…”
She then treats her to a spiel about how amazing the company, products and “the mission” are. [SPOILER ALERT: They are not!]
She even counteracts Violet’s #Poonique hashtag with one of her own – that ridiculous #savinglasheschanginglives one.
Violet will not back down. She knows there’s a highchance this Elite Green Status presenter only loves Younique because she has her own little team of downlines (on whose efforts she’s earning commission from). Violet also rightly says that “…it’s a pyramid scheme with terrible overpriced products…”
I’ve decided she also earns herself a wildcard square for appropriate use of the #Poonique hashtag. 😉
Green Hun gives Violet some more squares to cross off on her bingo board. Yes, we can see the classic “pyramid schemes are illegal” right here.
Green Hun continues to tell Violet that she is “…very, very misinformed…” and urges her to do her research. In another great delusion, she says, “…Terrible products wouldn’t be selling like crazy :p and the prices are very reasonable…”
Are we reading from different pages, Green Hun? The products only seem to be “selling like crazy” because you presenters are madly buying-in ‘stock’ for your ‘business’ in desperation, and trying to get sympathy sales from your friends and relatives. As for the price… £23.00 for a clumpy, crappy, eye-irritating mascara really doesn’t constitute as “reasonable” in my book.
However, we are playing a game of MLM Bingo here, so let’s see what squares we can cross off Violet’s board.
It’s not illegal…”
Good news, Violet, you get two for the price of one in that first sentence. I’ll also award the “It’s not a pyramid scheme” square.
It’s not a pyramid scheme cos we sell products…”
Green Hun also uses the hashtag #hatersgonnahate. That means another square!
U r just a haterrrr…”
Due to Green Hun’s spiel of “I would rather #uplift, #empower and #validate others…” I will also award Violet the “I just love helping others” square.
I just love helping others…”
Four squares in one comment! We could be heading for a full house at this rate!
Green Hun isn’t quite finished with her point, though. She does acknowledge why Violet might be so annoyed by MLMs, by saying “…I agree that some people go about sharing the opportunity in a tacky and annoying way…”
I personally hate when MLMs are referred to as “the opportunity” but there we go. Violet still isn’t swayed.
I would be annoyed at constantly being called “misinformed” too, Violet. 😉
It is clear that these two aren’t going to agree, so Green Hun resorts to the saccharine “killing them with kindness” retorts. Oh, and a not-so-subtle swipe at Violet’s comprehension skills, of course.
“… If you fully understood direct sales I think your opinion of them would be more valuable ❤ …” says Green Hun, her scathing tone just oozing from the keyboard.
Was that an attempt at a burn? Is she attempting to insult Violet’s intelligence, simply because she (quite rightly) does not like MLMs? Fortunately, Violet doesn’t bite, simply acknowledging her sorrow that Green Hun has fallen down the MLM rabbit hole.
Green Hun doesn’t want Violet’s sympathy though.
There we have it – Violet is “…negative and closed minded [sic]”. Remember, Green Hun is genuine – she isn’t the type to fall for bullshit, and she truly loves helping people!
Oh, and a second wildcard earned for Violet, for using #Poonique in her critique. 😉
There isn’t a close enough descriptor on the bingo board for Green Hun’s final speech, but reading through the lines, I decided to award this square to Violet’s final tally…
U must have failed at MLM. U are just bitter…”
Close enough, I think – when Green Hun says “Direct sales isn’t for everyone…” that pretty much implies her assumption that Violet “must have failed at MLM“. Green Hun may not have used the word “bitter” (which is popular in hun-speak), but the use of “negative” is even better.
I’ll admit, when I first saw this Instagram exchange, I thought Green Hun was either bantering with Violet, or was a troll account. That’s why I commented with this:
However, Violet assures me that Green Hun is a real person, one who has been plaguing her posts every time she posts something anti-MLM. I checked out Green Hun’s profile, to see that she is indeed an Elite Green Status presenter (even though their Status resets to Yellow at the beginning of every month)…she also seems pretty adorable from her photos, so it is a huge shame seeing her passionately defend such a crappy excuse for a company.
However, we’re here to play MLM Bingo, so its time to check Violet’s bingo board.
The results are in, she earned herself six squares!
Alas, not enough for a line or full house…but don’t forget, she gained two wildcards for her appropriate use of the #Poonique hashtag in a conversation. So, let’s put those to good use on her bingo board!
That’s a line – congratulations Violet!
For your courageous MLM Bingo Battle on Instagram, I am very pleased to award your prize. Drum roll please…
EEEEKKKK! Congratulations Violet, you’ve won a Law of Attraction Mindset coaching session with the UK’s top mindset coach, Lola Affirmation! I am SO jealous of your success, hun – Lola will help take your bizniz all the way to the top!
Would you like to win a Law of Attraction Mindset coaching session too? Simply play MLM Bingo – the prize possibilities are endless! Perhaps you’ve managed to cross off more squares in one go than Violet? Share your exploits with us.
Thus ends our observation on this exciting and adrenaline-packed game – I would like to thank Timeless Vie for creating this very amusing social media pastime. I wonder how effective a Younique-specific board would be?
For now, keep sharing your funny screenshots and stories with me – you never know, they could end up being relevant to one of my upcoming articles. Names and photos of individuals will always be hidden, whether their screenshots came from a public domain or nay. 🙂
What’s next for Elle Beau?
On reflection, I do feel that I would like to rewrite my Poonique story into a proper novella – whether its an ebook, or if I find someone who would put me in print. The main reason being, I missed out “the smaller stuff” for the purpose of keeping the reader interested and driving the tale forward. When I wrote this blog, I wanted to mainly focus on the dodgy tactics I experienced, but on reflection I would like to talk more in-depth about everything I can remember.
I would like to rewrite my tale with the spreadsheet as more of a prominent reference point – it will also help me recall things in chronological order (i.e. when certain monthly kudos were released, little paltry orders etc). Mia is still lurking in some of the training groups, and is finding me screenshots to illustrate certain chapters. So, as well as writing anti-MLM articles, I will be working on producing a full, comprehensive story in the interim. I hope to set up a Kickstarter for this once I have an idea of costings.
If you like the anti-MLM aims I am working towards, please consider supporting me via Patreon. Anything is gratefully received.
Stay subscribed for upcoming anti-MLM news and articles, and of course the ever-popular #ShitHunsSay screenshots.
Don’t forget to join the MLM fight on social media – if you’re on Twitter, please give @ElleBeauBlog a follow (and help me get the #Poonique hashtag trending again!). Alternatively, join in the discussion with Elle Beau, the Anti-Blogger on Facebook. I am also on Instagram now – look for @ellebeaublog!
Please, also check out the good work of the people of Bot Watch, Juice Plus/MLM Lies Exposed and Timeless Vie. They work tirelessly to expose the truth and lies of the MLM industry, so anyone considering this line of work can make a fair, informed decision . In fact, I now have a Recommended Reading page for Anti-MLM writers and interesting lifestyle bloggers I think you will enjoy, such as Chammy in Real Life and my first Patreon, @yourolly.
For something a little different to pyramid schemes, I would also recommend a look at what Bad Psychics are up to. Award-winning and seen-on-TV, they have worked to expose false claims made by psychics, mediums and the paranormal since 2003.